How To Own Your Own Home: A Guide for Millennials

Owning property has been the long-held Australian Dream – a place to call your own with a clothesline out the back, a veranda out the front and an old rocking chair – but over the last few years it has become much more difficult to turn that dream into a reality.

Millennials have been given the rawest end of the stick. With house prices consistently rising, they’ve been effectively priced out of the market. It’s tougher to acquire property in your twenties in this day and age, but it is by no means impossible.

Here are six ways to procure your first home.

1. Get a good job that pays well

This is common sense but important nonetheless. Getting a good job should be your number one priority. Ignore the fact that education is essential to securing most well paying positions and that education in Australia is far more accessible to the upper classes. Ignore the difficulties you might face in accessing financial support while studying. Ignore whatever might hold you back in the workplace – your age, your gender, or the colour of your skin – just get out there, grab those balls by the horns and make some goddamn money! Be sure also, to enter a lucrative industry and do not even attempt to follow so-called ‘passions’. Steer clear of the arts and education industries, hospitality, healthcare, public service, social or youth work, disability support services, or any of those other idealist-type difference-making professions.

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2. Save

You know those luxuries that you allow yourself – clothing, electricity, toilet paper ­– have you ever thought about simply going without? You don’t need them! It’s a waste of precious money that could be more sensibly invested in something like say, property. Be thrifty. Every dollar is important.

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3.Get Yourself a Guarantor

Do your parents own a home? Do you have a rich, eccentric uncle? Does that German second cousin of yours who found you on Facebook a couple of years ago have some assets? If so, you’ve got everything you need to enter the market! Using other people’s wealth as a bargaining chip has never been easier, and the bestest news of all is that if you default on your loan, the repercussions for you are minimal. Not only will a guarantor help you to purchase a home, but you’ll also rest comfortably knowing that you’ve contributed to the ongoing maintenance of class hierarchies and the uneven distribution of wealth. Yee-haw!

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4. Squat

Keep an eye out for unoccupied homes in the areas you’d like to live in. Once you’ve found the right one, shack up. It’s a simple as that. After a short period of time – 12 years, to be exact – the property will be legally yours, and you’ll be free to renovate, rent it out, and do pretty much whatever the hell you want to do with it, just like this guy.

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5. Lower your expectations

This may come as a shock, but your first home may not be your dream home. One day you’ll own that three-bedroom with the built in robes, the ensuites and that room dedicated solely to internet memes, but it might be out of your price range for quite some time. So start small; settle. Quit browsing real estate websites and instead, pay a visit to your local electrical goods store. Discarded refrigerator boxes make for a sensible and affordable first home.

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6. Inherit

If there’s anyone in your family that is over the age of 70, it might be a good idea to start thinking about what they’ll bequeath to you. How much money do they have? How many people will they need to divide it between? Will it be enough for a house deposit? Some quick calculations can provide a rough idea of what to expect. It also pays dividends to be extra nice to them during these relatives in this period of old age, as many are still altering their wills right up to their final days. And finally, consider how you might sabotage competing family members to encourage a last minute change of plans.

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Got another tip for first home buying millennials? Let us know in the comments below!

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6 thoughts on “How To Own Your Own Home: A Guide for Millennials

  1. Hmmm – all good and viable options to get onto the property ladder James. We could ask all those pollies to give up the ‘negative gearing’ ghost and donate their investment properties to hard working Millenials looking to buy. I mean, I am sure that Senator Barry O’Sullivan does not need his 33 properties

    Liked by 1 person

  2. True and funny.
    I bought land and build a house when I was 21 and I was in Australia for only 3 years. Hard saving and 7 days at work. Prices 11 years ago were lower but so was my pay. It’s possible to do even now days, especially buying a smaller, older and further out home. Is it worth it? Not always!
    I sold mine 2 years later. It’s one thing to save and buy, it’s another to live pay to pay for having your name on a deed for a bunch of bricks.
    When I die those bricks won’t be coming with me, my time traveling and enjoying beautiful moments doing fun things with my loved ones it’s worth more.
    I would say the best option is Squat and I didn’t even know about, thank you!
    Great post 🙂

    Like

  3. Well thank you James, you have destroyed all the hope I had at moving out of my parents house and childhood room. You have helped me realise that I may need to be a little politer to my Great Great Aunt or give up that expensive ribbed toilet paper I’ve grown accustomed to 💁🏻

    Like

  4. But I’m a bar manager/aspirational artist who lives for TP, electricity, and clothing!

    My German second cousin catfished me out of the deposit on my third refrigerator box and I’m banking on my imagined inheritance to keep in good supply of mashed vegetable on toast! Meanwhile developers have my squat marked for gentrification…

    Oh to be a born again baby boomer!
    (Dylan Moran expresses this perfectly)

    Our generation might be worse off, but then again… somebody think of the children!

    Like

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